Product Description
Written and illustrated by a young girl who was sexually molested by a family member, this book reaches out to other children in a way that no adult can. Jessie's words carry the message, "It's o.k. to tell; help can come when you tell."

This book is an excellent tool for therapists, counselors, child protection workers, teachers, and parents dealing with children affected by sexual abuse.

Jessie's story adds a sense of hope for what should be, and the knowledge that the child protection system can work for children. Simple, direct, and from the heart, Jessie gives children the permission and the courage to deal with sexual abuse.

"Please Tell! is a beautifully simple book with a profoundly important message for children who have been sexually abused: the abuse wasn't their fault. Written and illustrated by Jessie, herself a pre-teen survivor of sexual abuse, it tells kids just what to do to get the help they need."
Kristin A. Kunzman, abuse therapist and author of The Healing Way: Adult Recovery from Childhood Sexual Abuse

Customer Reviews (6)

Good Book for Child Abuse Families to Read
Good book to read with your children when they have been abused.It helped our son be able to share with his feelings with me.I highly recommend reading this book to your children.

Please Tell
I am a counselor and recently adopted a little girl who suffered unspeakable abuse.This book assisted her in being able to talk with her therapist about her abuse so that her healing could begin.The fact that the book is written by a child allows children to relate on their level.I recommend this book for therapists working with children of abuse and families.

I have no basis for comparison
My baby girl listened, but seemed distant.I pray that the signs I've seen and guessed them to be signs of abuse are wrong.I bought the books to read to my little girl so she will know that she can tell her Dad if Mommy's family is hurting her.I pray not, but will not take any chances, as my Ex's family abused her until she was taken and put into a foster home, and then a girls Home at age 13.She's mentally twisted.I was wrong to think I could help her.It all fell apart when we moved to Kansas to be close to her (what she claimed were the GOOD part of her family), They are NOT.

Very Helpful
As a child therapist, this book is very useful when working with most child victims of sexual abuse. It is a way to help them open up about their own feelings by relating their story to Jessie's story.

Best help to help
Please Tell is one of the most amazing help I ever had with my clients.My youth get a comfort when they read this story.They don't feel alone any more, because another girl like them had the same bad experience.Then, they feel confident to talk about their own abuse.
It's the best help for helpers. ... Read more

Product Description
This Second Edition of Child Abuse is devoted to a topic of major social and clinical significance. In this book, the author describes the different types of abuse and discusses the influence they have on development and social consequences in childhood and adolescence. The book uses theory and research to convey the importance of multiple contextual influences that affect abuse and can be used to ameliorate it. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

Book
Lots of highlighting but it was all important stuff so it actually helped me. THANKS! Speedy service!

A must read for anyone working with children
Thx for an excellent contribution to the field of child development and in strategies for reducing the epidemic of child maltreatment!

Child abuse. Implications for child development
This is the second edition of a small, but important book on the implications of child abuse for child development and psychopathology. It is written by David A Wolfe, professor of psychology and psychiatry at the University of Western Ontario in London, Canada. He has been very active in the field of child abuse and neglect with several books to his name, like �Children of battered women�, �Preventing physical and emotional abuse of children�, �Alternatives to violence� and �Abnormal child psychology�. This book is part of the Sage Series on �Developmental Clinical Psychology and Psychiatry� prepared by experts in clinical child psychiatry, psychology, development and related disciplines. The focus is on the diagnosis, assesment, treatment and prevention of problems in developmental psychopathology that arise in the period from infancy through adolescence. The book is devided into six chapters: What is child maltreatment ?, Normal and abnormal child rearing patterns, A developmental perspective of the abused child, Unraveling the causes with theory, background and multidimentional influences and the last chapter on Prevention and treatment strategies. Since the first edition of this book (1987) there has been an explosion in child abuse research and therefore also more knowledge and background to understand the mechanisms involved. This is taken into account in this book, but also the fact that the author in the meantime had three children of his own has made this book very important for professionals working with abused and neglected children. ... Read more

Product Description

Customer Reviews (9)

Child Abuse and Culture: Working with Diverse Families
Fast service received book in stated condition.Thank You

Recource of Monumental Importance for Professionals No Excuse for not reading this one.
I have been a forensic interviewer at a Children's Advocacy Center for 9 years now.I train in the area of Forensic interviewing and specifically Diversity.I cannot say enough about the importance of Ms. Fonte's work here.From the perspective of a CAC Forensic Interviewer she is speaking directly to me and my needs in the field with this work.

CAC Executive Directors will find this book invaluable for the Standard Criteria regarding Agency Cultural Competancy.The Standard itself is addressed directly in one full chapter.If you have read this book when your review comes around and worked with it in relation to your Agency, in my humble opinon you will be on the cutting edge of the available thought and practice of Cultural Competancy at your Center.You will get it even if you can't implement it in your area just yet.This is your primer, and a MUST READ for Agency Cultural Competancy.

Ms. Fontes does talk specifically about Puerto Rican and Latino cultures in this volume more so than others, but do not discredit any part of the book for that.There are FAR reaching concepts and a paridigum shift talked about in the introduction by Jon Contes as going beyond Cultural sensitivity into more of an action and result based competency.And the book lives up to that at minimum as a GREAT PLACE TO START.

This book should become a Standard Classic in our field along side of others like Lamb and Poole's book on interviewing from the 90s, and Shame on us in the field if it does not.An interviewer dare not walk in to court anymore without have read and understood Lamb and Poole at least where if fits historically in forensic interviewing.One day this book will be of the same kind of importance.

BRAVO and Thank You To Lisa.

Real solutions to the problems I face in my work
I work with a lot of abused children and their families who come from all over the world. I also work with children and families with other problems in a healthcare setting. This book is fabulous, and not just for issues of abuse.

Despite the heady topic, it's a good read. HIghly interesting and engaging. I especially liked the chapter on punishment, discipline, & abuse in different cultures. These are delicate and complex problems and Fontes does a good job explaining them with clarity and wisdom. I now understand why we have such difficulty tackling this issue at work, and I have ideas about how to handle it differently. This book is intelligent and practical at the same time.

Every chapter ends with some questions to "think about and discuss." At first I thought it might be a little corny--but I have brought this book to my workplace and we discussed several of the chapters and the questions. They provided an easy route to important conversations that we had never had before.

I'm going to use it in a social work class I'm teaching next semester! I think it works for beginning students and experienced pros--this is ENTIRELY NEW material and much needed. This author has done her homework!

Something for Everyone
As a practicing clinician and college professor, I cannot overstate the importance of this book.As I read it, I realized that we all make quick and often inaccurate assumptions about one another, even when from the same culture.This book forces us to look at all of the ways in which we can oversimplify the behaviors or appearances of others and often jump to false and dangerous conclusions.It is certainly a book that anyone working with people from cultures other than their own (that means most of us)should read.it speaks both to the complexity and importance of the work and challenges us to look more carefully at what we do.

Excellent choice for graduate students preparing to work in schools
Dr. Lisa Aronson Fontes has written a unique and extremely helpful book that is a must read for anyone who works with children and families.I had my graduate students in school counseling read and discuss the book this past year and they found it to be extremely practial, enlightening and applicable to their work. It really engaged and challenged them and sparked an extremely rich and useful dialogue.I have been looking for a book like this for some time now and I am thrilled to have finally found a well researched, compassionate and clearly written book which speaks respectfully to the complexity of these issues. ... Read more

Product Description
When a child has experienced sexual abuse, he or she may struggle with low self-esteem and find it difficult to trust others. Though the mental damage from such abuse is significant, it can be substantially reversed if a caring adult is willing to dedicate a few minutes each day to helping the child heal. Finding Sunshine After the Storm contains forty compassionate activities kids who have suffered abuse can do to raise their self-esteem, establish boundaries, and identify people they can trust.

These simple activities drawn from a variety of therapeutic modalities are best used in combination with counseling to help kids recover from trauma and build confidence. As children work through this book, they will learn to deal with painful feelings in positive ways, reach out for support, and feel proud of themselves by "taking a bow" after important accomplishments. This workbook can help them reclaim the pride, joy, and security they may feel as though they have lost--the sunshine after the storm.

Product Description

This best-selling text offers a comprehensive look at child maltreatment and incorporates history, case vignettes, and the author's own experience as a child protection worker.

The author covers the history of child welfare, and neglect.  In addition, Understanding Child Abuse and Neglect explains case management procedures and focuses on how various professionals become involved in the child protection process and how treatment is undertaken.  The text concludes with an overview of functional and dysfunctional families, and contrasts healthy child development with development hampered by abuse sion of prevention and a consideration of the future.

Customer Reviews (11)

This book is very informative
I purchased this book for a psychology course. I rarely opened it but it did have several graphic illustrations of children victims of child abuse. However the content of the book is very informative and it does help understand and know what are the signs of child abuse

child abuse
This is an excellent read for students and people who are just interested in the dynamics of the field of child abuse.It's very thoughtful, full of experience and expertise in all aspects of the subject matter.

Understanding Child Abuse and Neglect Textbook
The seller shipped an as described textbook quite quickly, just in time for my class to start too.Very happy with seller, as well as dealing with Amazon purchases.

I would continue looking for textbooks for college classes through this method for sure.I stick with higher rated sellers - as experience tells me they are more consistent, exceptional in their descriptions on their items and by far much better resources than others.

Thank you for your continued high ratings for selling college textbooks at VERY REASONABLE prices!

great book
this is a great book if you're interested in understanding child abuse. the best part of the book is that it shows u examples

Awesome service!
The seller was quick and the book came in very good condition.Keep up with good job!! ... Read more

Product Description

Does your church know what to do if the worst happens to a child?

When Child Abuse Comes to Church is a practical guidebook, not only for those who have made the terrible discovery that child sexual abuse has occurred right in their own congregation it is for all who want to learn how to make their church safer for children, how to deal with the growing number of sexual "perpetrators" in dire need of help, and most especially how to guide, counsel and comfort parents of young victims.

Pastor Bill Anderson's church struggled for answers and practical guidance inside a maelstrom of pain and revulsion that overtook their congregation following one of the worst, most-publicized cases of multiple-child-abuse in recent history. And it began right in the nursery of their decent, Midwestern, Bible-believing church -.

Anderson gives practical advice on:

how to detect sexual abuse.

how to counsel young victims and their families.

how to find help from the right authorities.

When to involve outside counselors and therapists.

when and how to offer help to sexual "perpetrators."

how to manage media-relations.

relating to the courts and other secular authorities. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

This book was great!
I thought the title sounded good, so I bought the book.I was surprised and pleased to learn that it was a well-written book with lots of information that churches and pastors should consider.It emphasized the need to make our churches safe for children.I would encourage anyone who wants to know about child abuse to read this book!

every pastor needs this manual
This book outlines the nuts and bolts of making your church safer.You will benefit from the lessons he had to learn the hard way through dealing with an unsafevolunteer in the church. The church can either learn the hard way or learn from someone else's experience.This man wrote the book at least a decade ago.If the church listenened then, look at the suffering that would have been avoided.We better to take this mans advice.

Excellent Resource!
This is an excellent resource for anyone working with children in a church setting.It very simply, yet thoroughly outlines the dangers, the outcomes, and the steps to take to prevent abuse in the church.It alsoincludes a very helpful section on dealing with the media. ... Read more

Product Description
The sexual abuse of a child creates a devastating family crisis. Parents want to know what to do and say to help their child, both immediately and in the long term. "Helping your Child Recover from Sexual Abuse" offers practical guidance for parents who courageously face the days and months after a child's abuse. Written in a positive, reassuring jargon-free style, it discusses each stage of a child's recovery. Information for parents appears on the left-hand pages; sample conversations and activities for parent and child together are on the right-hand pages.The book presents the collective wisdom of numerous parents who have been through this experience and have learned how to help their children feel stronger, safer, braver, more lovable, worthwhile, and competent. Topics covered in the book include: What to do when abuse is first disclosed?Helping a child cope with the legal system; Responding to the reactions of friends and loved ones; Children's reactions to abuse; How parents and children grieve differently; Rebuilding a child's self-esteem; Dealing with confusion about sexuality; Helping a child feel safe and in control; Typical problems at different ages; And recognizing when a child is getting better. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

The Best Book I've read to help my children
This book has been an excellent book that has helped me walk through the steps of child abuse.Some of the things I love about this book are: ease of reading-easy to understand with suggestions on how to help my children.It has helped me to understand where I am as a parent.Short chapters make jumping around easier. I have young children and this book has been a tremendous help for all of our family.

Excellent for parents going through this horror.
I have a three-year-old daughter who has been molested by her biological father and it has been a roller coaster, still is as we are still in the midst of a DCS investigation.Though he has been indicated, we are not certain what the courts will rule.As I picked the book up to scan through it, it was amazing how many things "hit home" and made me feel validated, which is something you find yourself needing as the non-offending parent.Although I wish the book were updated, it is still a very valuable resource.I am glad my daughter's play therapist recommended it to me.

Helpful book that touches on a lot of subjects and gives "what to say" advice
For my husband and I, this book was reassuring that we're doing things right, which is truly not much of a comfort in this horrific time in our lives. Our oldest son sexually abused our youngest (9 years difference).This book didn't cover much at all on sibling sexual abuse but did cover very real issues like how important it is to BELIEVE your child and give them support, dealing with the responses from friends and family, handling your childs reactions and daily life, the legal system, grieving, self esteem, sexuality, dealing with the abuse as your child matures and trying to move on.As my title says, each section gives a guide/suggestion on things you could say to your child to help them in each situation. There were also some excercises that could be done with older children to help them process things out.

On a personal note, if you are having to look this subject up in Amazon, my heart goes out to you. We never would have expected to be in this "club" that no one wants to be in. There are so many emotions to deal with right now. I want to give this book 5 stars, however it didn't give me any specific info on sibling abuse or any new ideas and I truthfully am still at the stage that Im looking for "the answer" - the one thats going to make all this pain and suffering go away. I know I'll never find it, but, nevertheless.....

I think the book is a worthwhile read. ... Read more

Product Description
For millions of men on the path to recovery, VICTIMS NO LONGER is the next step.

The first book written specifically for men, VICTIMS NO LONGER examines the changing cultural attitudes toward male survivors of incest and other sexual trauma. Now, in this Second Edition, this invaluable resource continues to offer compassionate and practical advice, supported by personal anecdotes and statements of male survivors. VICTIMS NO LONGER helps survivors to:

* Identify and validate their childhood experiences
* Explore strategies of survival and healing
* Work through issues such as trust, intimacy, and sexual confusion
* Establish a support network for continued personal recovery
* Make choices that aren't determined by abuse

Psychotherapist Mike Lew has worked with thousands of men and women in their healing from the effects of childhood sexual abuse, rape, physical violence, emotional abuse, and neglect. The development of strategies for recovery from incest and other abuse, particularly for men, has been a major focus of his work as a counselor and group leader.

Thoroughly updated and revised, and including an expanded Resources section, VICTIMS NO LONGER educates survivors and professionals about the recovery process -- speaking to the pain, needs, fears, and hopes of the adult male survivor. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (35)

Victims No Longer
it said the book was in a good condition this book was a well used ex library book not very impressed with the state of the bookdisappointing

Book:Victims No Longer Recovery from sexual child abuse
I bought this for my son, who was molested as a child, but he hates to read and told me outright that he would not read it!I wish he would have though, it looked like a really good book.It came to me quickly and in great condition!

helpful book
I'm glad there is a book for men written by men. I understand my husband better now after reading some of this book. It has helped him to understand himself better as well and has given him a measure of relief just reading a few things in the book. I realize that recovery is a very presonal process but if a man is ready to face it I feel this book will help him heal.At this point we do not like to read the experiences in the first part of the book. Some may find them graphic although some men may feel this is important maybe to see that they are not alone or that others can relate to their experiences. The experiences may also help the men learn how to verbalize his own experience as this is an important part of the healing process. I'm sure they are there for an important purpose

it really is that good
This is the best book hands down for men recovering from sexual abuse. Lew gracefully and intelligently encompasses all the issues in life that can be affected by sexual abuse.

Recovery does happen!
I was introduced to this book in treatment back in 1991. It led me in the direction to focus on recovery and not the abuse. I now recommend this book to anyone working with male survivors or that is a male survivor of sexual abuse/rape. ... Read more

Product Description
A reissue of the now-classic anthology (with more than 60,000 copies sold) of deeply moving testimonies by survivors of child sexual abuse--with a new afterword by Ellen Bass, co-author of The Courage to Heal. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (17)

Totally Honest
The writings in this book are totally honest, eye openning and a must for anyone struggling with the memories of sexual abuse.This book can open the doors in your healing process and lets you know that you are not alone in your journey to a healthy emotional life.

Worth reading
Good information, helps those who are affected by the abuse to know you are not alone.

I Never Told Anyone
As an adult survivor of sexual abuse I found this book to be interesting but not really what I expected.The book is comprised of stories from abuse victims.I expected the stories to deal with the emotional aspect of overcoming the abuse however this book was mostly vivid accounts of the abuse itself and most of the accounts were from the 1950's or earlier, some of them even dated back as far as the 1800's.

Childhood Sexual Abuse Stories
This material is timeless, in that the stories will always be relevant, though the problem with this book is that most of the stories are very dated in terms of the time in history that they occurred.My wife as a victim of childhood sexual abuse, would be a better story reference than someone from the 20's, 30's, 40's, or 50's... as the treatment of women during those decades was viewed completely different from the 60's going forward.Still a worthwhile read for women who need to understand they are not alone in this suffering, but it could do with some updated stories and references to more modern women.

Thanks.
Lynn

Book for molested and raped females to know they are not alone.
If you are a male that was molested, this book may not help.The book also has overtones that males are all bad because of their sexual drive and females are predominantly victims of being primarily sexual objects.If you are looking to get over sexual abuse, this book does not seem to provide answers for how to find a cure. ... Read more

Product Description
Interviewing children who may been sexually abused is a daunting task fraught with far-reaching consequences for the children, families, institutions, and professionals involved.With no room for error, forensic and clinical interviewers must navigate the complex and often contradictory evidence that informs their decision making.

Here, Kathleen Coulborn Faller, a leading expert on child sexual abuse, critically analyzes the research on assessing child sexual abuse.Noting that issues such as memory and suggestibility, questioning techniques, the use of media, and false allegations remain hotly contested, chapters guide readers in applying available research to professional judgment while drawing also on best practice guidelines and conceptual, clinical, and consensus-based writings.The only up-to-date resource of its kind,Interviewing Children About Sexual Abuse covers the entire interview process, showing professionals how to structure, document, and follow up on children's responses in interviews; work with children who are very young, have special needs, or come from diverse backgrounds; use standardized tests and measures; formulate conclusions about sexual abuse; and defend those decisions in a courtroom or clinical setting.

Mental health, forensic, and child welfare professionals will find in this volume a wealth of expert information that will guide them through the often murky, always emotional process of interviewing children about sexual abuse. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

Interviewing Children about Sexual Abuse: Controversies and Best Practice
Interviewing Children about Sexual Abuse: Controversies and Best PracticeThis is a must have for any Forensic Interviewer.Excellent information with research to back it up.

Excellent!
This book is well-written, very informative and provides details that are true to real life situations.

Very useful !
We have to be prepared to fight against children sexual abuse and this is a very important book to do it. ... Read more

Product Description
How to know when children have been sexually abused poses special challenges. Some children make direct and clear statements, while others are more indirect in what they say. It is easy to attribute other meanings to their words.

Still other children show the effects of their abuse through behaviors, which can be sexualized, but not necessarily. Children may also be withdrawn, moody, aggressive, restless, and anxious. Finally some children show no obvious signs at all.
... Read more

Customer Reviews (1)

Short, concise, for those who may need to know
I came across this Kindle "book" while doing research for my fiction writing. This topic is often "swept under the carpet" by our society, giving those who perpetrate the crime even more power over their victims. I salute Dr. Gilgun for making this information available.

This is a paper, not a book. If you need in-depth information, there are a number of psychological textbooks available that cover this subject. However, if you have the misfortune of suspecting someone you know might have been sexually abused, this is an excellent place to start. Certainly, the price is right.

On the negative side, there are a few typos (I'm nitpicking - I think I counted four, hey, I'm an author too), but the intent of the writer is easy to figure out. And I was left with the impression that it may be an excerpt from a larger work. There seems to be a couple of references to prior information that I feel that I somehow "missed", but that may be just me. The work does fill in what you need to know as you read on, and will be especially helpful to those who need this information in a hurry.

The topic of how to identify a sexually abused child is narrow, and adequately covered by the paper. I was happy to see some suggestions about "where do you go from here" at the end. Personally, I would like more of this type of information made available to the public, as these assaults (and the lasting trauma they bring) happen much more frequently than most people realize, and can be found within the confines of almost any extended family. Again, my thanks to Dr. Gilgun.

After writing this review, I noticed the book, "Shame, Blame & Child Sexual Abuse" by Jane F. Gilgun, Ph.D., LICSW, purchased it, and am now halfway through. It is excellent, and this paper seems to be an excerpt from it, one of 15 chapters. (The last four chapters must be exceedingly long as compared with the others, as they constitute half the book.) If you don't mind spending a little bit more, I would heartily recommend purchasing the entire book from the start. It's well worth the price. I'll write a separate review for it when I finish it. ... Read more

Product Description
Part I of the book is the powerful true story of a young Florida girl's death from abuse at the hands of her mother's boyfriend, with the acquiescence of the mother.It is an intimate picture of this tragedy, largely told from the perspective of the child.

Part II was extensively updated and revised in 2002.It is a comprehensive but concise guide to understanding and confronting child abuse and neglect, domestic violence, and dating violence.It has concrete advice for parents and young people on building healthy relationships.

Readers are often deeply moved and motivated by this book.It enjoys a great popularity with young people and is highly valued by many educators and professional trainers. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (49)

The book was in great condition
I was very pleased with the product look like it was brand new even though it was used....I read the book already three times ...this happned in my home town and Ive been looking for it every where and a friends of mine told me to check Amazon. Thanks

Tears Won't Bring Her Back
I also cried and cried when I read this book.I mean, I cried for a long time, just sobbing and crying.I absolutely couldn't believe it!!!I really couldn't believe how a mother allowed her devilish "boyfriend" to kill this little angel!The mother allowed it, the guy slowly killed her!I just want to take this girl, hug her, and keep her away from all the horrific sins of this world forever, but God has already done that.Both the mother and her boyfriend should rot in prison for eternity - and that wouldn't be enough punishment for what they did!

Should Be Mandatory Reading
I am a retired law enforcement officer.This book was part of the curriculum for a Criminal Justice class I was taking a few years back.It gives the perspective from the abused child's point of view, from being starved and being forced to do such things as eat soap, to the actual physical beatings the child endured until she finally died.What was done to this child makes the Susan Smith case (See "Susan Smith: Victim or Murderer) seem almost like kindness to a child in comparison. Anybody who doesn't realize these things go on everyday all over the United States is living with a blindfold over their eyes.All professionals who deal with children on a regular basis need to read this book.It contains a number of ways child abuse can be noticed and reported.

Hitting Close to Home
I grew up in Orlando, Florida. I read this book when I was in High School. I stayed up all night, reading the book straight through. I couldn't put it down. It was so heart-wrenching to read what Ursala went through. But, what really hit home for me is something I found out after reading the book. Another friend of mine, the next day, mentioned how she had stayed up really late reading a book. I then mentioned staying up late to read Death from Child Abuse. There was a pause and then, "She was my best friend." I was in shock. Reading the book was kinda like reading or watching the news and hearing someone got hurt - it's sad, it's real - but it's "someone else's real" - not my real. But, hearing my friend's tone, as she told me of the reality that happened just two houses down from her, my heart hurt. She also said the neighbor they speak of in the book, who would do her laundry - that was my friend's mom, who I also knew very well. Even though I didn't personally know USA (I was 4 months old when she was killed), hearing a first hand account of what I had read weighed heavy on my heart for days, as though it were something I had seen in my own back yard. I can't believe that someone would be such a monster, and hurt an innocent little girl, who barely did anything to deserve being punished at all. This book is an amazing, heart-wrenching story - it's impossible to read it without it touching your heart. :/

Very Happy
I recived this book a lot sooner than i expeced. The book was in better shape than i thought, I was very impressed. Iwould deffintly order from this seller agine. Thank-you. ... Read more

Product Description

The sexual abuse of children is one of the most morally unsettling and emotionally inflammatory issues in American society today. It has been estimated that roughly one out of every four girls and one in ten boys experience some form of unwanted sexual attention either inside or outside the family before they reach adulthood.

Customer Reviews (15)

Excellent Book
Begin reading this book by setting your personal feelings aside.This is a book that tells the other side of the story.It answers the question we all ask when we hear about a child being molested... "What was he thinking?"

Difficult to read, Sensitive subject and material
The opening paragraph detailing how a young man began molesting his little girl was enough to make me want to run screaming from the book but I tried to read it all.Ick Icky Ick.Obviously, it is a difficult subject and I think the author did a great job on his study.He was very meticulous and used lots of men in the study.I wish he would have covered men and women both as perps but that might have been a hell of a lot of extra work!Anyway, the book would be a good reference for a paper or something of that nature but I felt like a weirdo reading it in my doctor's waiting room.

A delicate but critical subject
Unspeakable acts would also be put out of our awareness if possible. However, sexual abuse of children appears in the news more that anyone would like. This is the only book I know of based on interviews with perpetrators, seeking to understand the influences on their abhorrent behavior. It also searches the thoughts and motivations of such individuals. Beginning to understand these people is the first step to learning how to deal with them in a more effective manner than trying to pretend their behavior does not exist or trying to stamp it out mindlessly. In my opinion, this is a landmark book.
Joseph G. Langen, author of The Pastor's Inferno.

Unspeakable Actts Answered the Big Questions
Unspeakable Acts answered allofthequestions that have haunted me for years. It is a wonderful resource for families of pediophiles. Much is written about victimsandit isdifficult to find information about the abusers. My thanks to the author.

supervising clinician experienced in child abuse work
It is regretable that mindless mass media level reactors have the need to srtrike out thoughtlessly at a scholar's efforts and thereby reduce an excellent book's ratings-- in the process creating doubt in the minds of people who might need to acquaint themselves with this work and its findinds (I notice, to my great surprise, that a significant number of people rated these "one star" review as helpful???).

Of those two very negative reviews, one seemed to be looking more for some kind of lurid and sensationalistic page-turner novel, and the other a brimstone and fire "from on high" Puritamical condemnation of child molesters.Long ago, a philosopher once said, "Noting human is alien to me," and this must be the motto of clinicians working with people whose unfortunate life course causes them to crave experiences that seek satisfaction at the expense of others.But if what one needs is to play the balme game, then we don't have to seek ever more effective treatment approaches: We can just keep turning to the "chain them to the walls and throw away the keys" methods that seem to be coming so much in vogue these days among so many state legislatures.

However, before we go too far in sharpening the knives of blood lust vegenfulness, let me remind you that America discovered child abuse as a mass cotatge industry for the most part durind the Reagan administration.This was the time when we made fashionable our hysteria regarding all the weird things supposedly happening to children from the world filled with hordes of Satas-ritualists and kiddie-porners that seemed to be JUST EVERYWHERE.Yet, interestingly, during that same decade where we became so supposedly concerned about children being maltreated, the number of children that slipped under the poverty line quietly and unremarkately increased by 25%.

Hence, it is not only the research/treatment intervention methods of the Puritanists we need to question, but possibly the motives that drive and illuminate their involvement in the movement to keep children safe from predators.These people also make their supposed concernn for victims a bit confusing-- given that a considerable segment of the child molestor population were first victims of abuse themselves.

My point is that this book seeks straight forward understanding of the phenomenoon of child predation, and of the men caught up in this sad and ugly business-- the same sort of undertsanding that is not clouded by pointless judgmentalism that is used by social scientists to understanding the often equally cruel world of everyday children and adolescents.Of special interest here if the author's social behaviorist/symbolic interactionist perspective.He is trying to elucidate the way the perpetrator's sense of meaning is organized to produce such problematic behavior as child miolestation.

Of course this sort of thing might be very much lacking in passion for MacCarthists who for some time have been without communists to kick around anymore, and who have not graduated to the new boogey man (terrorists).MY SUGGESTION: read the book carefully and on its own terms, then do the same with other books on the subject.And if it requires work to do this, remember that even child molesters are worthy of this effort on your part-- that is, if your goal to to have them be your patients rather than your Island of the Damned inmates. ... Read more

Product Description
Wounded Boys Heroic Men is a workbook for transformation. Specifically written for and about men. This is the first book to address their issues of physical, sexual, and psychological abuse. Dr. Daniel Sonkin carefully prepares a road map for the recovery process, including insightful stories of real survivors, as well as direction and reassurance.

More important, this unique book provides hope, relief, and comfort for millions of victims too proud to explore their suffering. Carefully analyzing the feelings, attitudes, and behaviors of abused men. Dr. Sonkin teaches methods that break the vicious cycle of violence, make peace with the abuser, and in return find peace within.

Comprehensive and enlightening, Wounded Boys Heroic Men is also a guide to help partners, friends, and family members better understand the struggles these men face, so that they can support the healing journey. Dr. Sonkin's message is simple: With help, healing is possible. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (9)

Book: Wounded Boys Heroic Men
I bought this for my son, who was molested as a child, but he hates to read and told me outright that he would not read it!I wish he would have though, it looked like a really good book.It came to me quickly and in great condition!

Men healing themselves from within
I would recommend this book for men who still have the emotional scares, the resentments, child abuse issues from our childhood holding us back from achieving happiness and serenity.We can become heroes, over come addictions, free ourselves from the bonds of our pain once and for all.

Far from the best of its type
Of the growing number of books about male sexual abuse, this one rates just mediocre.The author seems to believe that abused men all grow up to be abusive, especially toward women.He ignores female abusers and the special issues of gay men.I'd recommend one of the better books in this area, especiallyGartner's Beyond Betrayal or Betrayed as Boys, but also Lew's Victims No Longer and Hunter's Abused Boys.Also, Moran's The Tricky Part is a great memoir

Clarification to comments by "Ken"
The section of the book that the reviewer is referring to is a quote from a member of my men's group, and not about myself.However, it is important that readers understand that for many different reasons, people are unable to face the realities of their abuse and as a result may inadvertently put loved ones at risk.This is unfortunately an all-to-common consequence of all forms of child maltreatment.It is not constructive to judge their actions in the past, but to help them change for the present and future.What was important for this particular man, was that he did ultimately face his problems and heal not only his own wounds, but his relationship with his son.He struggled for many years and his hard work ultimately paid off.Today, he has a wonderful relationship with his son and his new grandchildren.

Don't waste your time
Dan Jay Sonkin Ph.D should not be trying to guide adult males of childhood abuse.I purchased this book thinking "finally a book written for men that would be a perfect guide to self help".I made it to page 38 when I realized that this Ph.D should not be trying to write anything but his resignation in his trade.Dr. Sonkin betrayed his son by permitting a man who abused him as a child, to become close to his son.On page 38Dr. Sonkin own admission was that he never told his wife, or anyone else for that matter that he was abused sexually by his uncle.In Dr. Sonkin's stupidity he permitted a sexual predator (his Uncle) to become close to his son, and of course his son was also sexually abused by the same uncle. I am surprised that Dr. Sonkins wife didn't divorce him; and I am amazed that he can look his son in the eyes.Dr. Sonkin didn't have the courage to stand up to his Uncle like a grown adult male, he didn't have the courage to tell his wife what his uncle did to him as a child, and instead he was a coward that cost his son his innocence.Hang it up Doc, how dare you try to guide other men, when you can't even guide yourself. ... Read more

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Product Description
The editors of this collection are experienced practitioners and teachers of forensic psychology. They have collected chapters written by nationally and internationally respected experts in applied research and practice to provide others with their best advice and knowledge on conducting evaluations for and testifying in court. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (2)

up to date resource for professionals
This is a collection of articles by respected, well-known professionals in the fields of evaluating children about sexual abuse, and using that information in a court setting.It has critical information for any mental health professional who is engaged in such activities, including therapists who get 'caught up' in these situations, at times, unawares.The information on normative sexual behaviors for children is especially comprehensive. The section on actually testifying is more brief than the title implies, so if this is your main focus, a different volume would be preferable.However, overall an essential component for the professional's library.

Forensic psychologist's review
This is an excellent resource for forensic psychologists and therapists who deal in child sexual abuse. It is very thorough and up to date on the research as well as providing the practical information to conduct the state-of-the art evalautions.

The authors are to be commended on putting together this valuable and and easy to use resource. ... Read more

Product Description

• How can professionals build constructive relationships with families where the parents dispute professional allegations of serious child abuse?
• How can meaningful safety for children be created in these families?
• How can professionals work together constructively in such cases?

Working with ‘Denied’ Child Abuse presents an innovative, safety-focused, partnership-based, model called Resolutions, which provides an alternative approach for responding rigourously and creatively to such cases. It describes each stage of this practical model and demonstrates the approach through many case examples from therapists, statutory social workers and other professionals working in Europe, North America and Australasia. The book is key reading for legal, health and social care professionals working in the area of child protection. ... Read more

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Customer Reviews (5)

Seriously Disturbing
This is not a book for those who want to justify their own views or religious position, or politicize this very troubling problem.

Freda presents work from her research with 'real life' pedophiles and asks the hard questions about how they came to be and what should we as a society do about them? She brings to light things that most would have kept hidden in a dark place. Indeed much of the book is made up of the stories of the abused.... who have in turn become abusers.

To those who just want to lock them up and throw away the key- she challenges that this 'denial' will allow use to continually overlook how this terrible social plague arises and doom us to continually repeating history. Freda argues that incarceration - with appropriate treatement is an appropriate way to mend these 'bent' people and help reduce the likelihood that their actions do not re-emerge if (and when) they are released.

Interestingly the commonly held view of 'dirty old men' seems to be the flipside of reality - where family and friend and older youths are often those who abuse most often.

What causes some of the abused to become abusers themselves? Freda's conclusion is that those who blame their abusers for the crime tend to turn out alright, while those that blame themselves (I asked for it, there must be something about me that attracted him) more likely become abusers in their own right.


For those who abhor child abusers- it may even spark a small light of compassion for these 'broken specimens' who were once innocent children themselves - only to have this stolen and then grow into a monster withig themselves. Given that we can't always lock the away for 'the term of their natural lives' something evidence based should be done.

A riveting but dark read, and disturbing to come face to face with such depravity, not a bed-time read. Painful realizing that it is unlikely that the implications of her research face an uphill battle to change the way society and the criminal justice system sees this very important issue.

It won't teach you how to stop it or understand it.
Graphicly detailing the abuse suffered and administered by these victims turned offenders, this book is definitely not for everyone.This is raw, this is gritty, and WILL NOT do anything to aid in the recovery of a victim, an offender, or their spouses.If anything, such graphic retellings can cause flashbacks and regression... definitely do not read if you are currently in treatment!

I envision that the people that most often pick this book up are offenders who were victims, victims that fear becoming offenders, and their parents and spouses... and they are looking in the wrong place.If your intent is to understand offenders, or heal an offender, look at books on sexual addiction-- Patrick J. Carnes is the best in that field.If you are looking to understand a victim or stop the cycle from victim to offender, there are MANY wonderful books out there on victims recovery... and the best way for a victim not to become an offender themselves is to put their heart into their therapy, and also release their anger.The anger and confusion left behind by abuse are the seeds that eventually grow into becoming a sexually abusive individual yourself.

Just the facts...
If you are looking for TRUE insight into the minds of sexual offenders, then this is the book for you. The book is a collection of stories from actual offenders in Australia. It is not for those with weak stomachs or hearts. It is for those who truly want to understand how the mind of an offender works. These guys were all in jail where they underwent a specialized treatment program...after the other inmates and staff were educated so the sex offenders could be housed with regular criminals. They are not novelists and nothing is sugar-coated. Some stories are apologies to victims, while others continue to minimize their offenses. Either way, the reader gets an unabridged version of the thoughts of sex offenders, without a lot of psychological, investigative, analytical commentary...just the dark truth.

Many questions are left unanswered!
This book offers a series of very graphic and painfully depressing
recollections of child abuse by victims (mostly boys) that eventually
became offenders.The graphic nature of these revelations may be too
much for more sensitive readers.The most shocking revelations do not
include the means of sexual, physical and emotional abuse that these
children suffered through, but the individuals that perpetrated this
abuse and the total lack of any moral or religious impediments to
their behavior.

In the case of one of these children, the abusers
were part of the foster care system of Australia (Department of
Community Development), i.e., a religious organization that was
licensed by the State to care for children in the foster care system. ...
In the case of another boy sent to a boys home, also licensed by the
State, this child was subjected to sexual torture that defies the most
depraved imagination.

What this book lacks is answers to some of the
most basic questions surrounding child abuse...Why some children who
are severely abused do not themselves become abusers while others do
abuse children as adults?Why do some individuals become child
abusers who have not been subjected to abuse as children?Are there
treatment regimens for adult child abusers that are indeed successful
or do we need to lock up the abusers for the rest of their lives to
protect our children?

In the final analysis this book is basically
just a depressing series of recollections by adults severely abused as
children. ...

People don't know all the pain that's there
This book shows how hurt the victims become, how one moment in a lifetime can ruin a life. It is inspirational and shows how careful we must be with the young children of the world ... Read more

Product Description
Perpetrators rarely think of child sexual abuse as abuse. Rather they believe abuse is love, play, a thrill, bliss, the best feeling in the world, and sometimes revenge. This article show what child sexual abusers think of they abuse they perpetratred.Based on years of interviews with perpetrators, both in and out of prison for child sexual abuse. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (1)

Child Sexual Abuse isn't What You Think it Is
This article is full of first-person stories about what child sexual abuse means to abusers.Thrills, chills, relief, comfort, mood enhancement, love, bliss, romance, something they deserve,feeling good, vengeance, aand getting what they want.This is what perpetrators think child sexual abuse is. If you've ever wondered why they do it, this article tells you.

Survivors often have an intuition about what abusers get out of sexual abuse.In their own words, perpetrators talk about their abuse. ... Read more

Product Description
R.E.P.A.I.R. is a Six-Stage Program for abusesurvivors that will transform your life forever!